Are You Ready for Some Football?

Wednesday night, the Cowboys go to the New Meadowlands to take on the defending Super Bowl champions.

Other than the game being on a weekday, it’s a fine opening matchup. Here you have a team that’s won a pair of Super Bowls in the last five years playing another team that’s won a single playoff game in the last sixteen seasons.

To put that in perspective, the Patriots have played in SIX Super Bowls under two head coaches since the Cowboys played in their last one. Green Bay has WON two with two different coaches. The Carolina Panthers and Oakland Raiders have played in Super Bowls AND garnered the number one pick overall since the Cowboys last played in a Super Bowl.

But for some ridiculous reason, you all love the Cowboys and want to see them play on TV. A lot. Why? The Cowboys are a fraud, and one of the reasons they don’t need to get better…by hiring a professional general manager…is because you all still tune in to see them suck. Perhaps you need a little lesson in supply-and-demand. They don’t have to get better because you will watch them no matter how average they are.

We’ve taken numerous shots at the Cowboys here on this blog. I’m pleased to say what I want from the Cowboys is what they’ve given us for this past decade and a half:

Consistent mediocrity.

I’d love for the Cowboys to continue this for another hundred years: finish between 6-10 and 10-6 every year for that time period, occasionally make the playoffs and then get axehandled by better teams in the first or second round of the playoffs. They can repeat the same fail over and over. My favorite part is watching their fans get overly excited and then weep over the latest crumble.

Few teams make me as happy when they fail. Maybe the Pittsburgh Penguins, the NHL’s second favorite team. The Yankees? No way. The Yankees actually have class acts on their squad. The Miami Heat? Possibly. When you are a league front office favorite, your team is going to be hated. Deservedly so, might I add. When you play by a different set of rules than other teams, you should be hated.

Notice there’s no mention of the Cowboys being hated because they are good. They are not. They are consistently mediocre, and I can’t understand for the life of me why their fans are so myopic. Half of them think they are going to win the Super Bowl this year. That’s such a horrible thought, I plan on taking a cruise to nowhere if they’re even playing in that game. The last thing I want to see is their idiot fans celebrating anything…not even going 1-15 and getting the first overall pick. That’s a chance to draft a difference maker. That’s the last thing we want Dallas to do.

Cowboys fan, I’m seriously hoping for you to go a strong 8-8, just missing the playoffs by falling apart in a late season game you have almost won. That way, you don’t want wholesale change. Your myopia will continue and I’ll be happy watching you put those big blue star blinders on.

About bittersportspills

I love sports. I don't love the hype, homerism, ratings talk, self-important egomaniacs, bias or any of the other nonsense you get with the national media. Nor will you get the two clowns on sports talk radio who stage phony arguments. It doesn't make it entertaining. It makes it time to turn on your iPod and jam instead of listening to white noise generators. This is the sports blog for you, the ones who don't like everything Los Angeles or New York. Just because the sporting media is based there doesn't mean we have to like their teams. We do treat them fairly, though. That means if one of those cities has an average QB who plays particularly well...we'll note it. If they're garbage, we'll say so. Instead of crying "why, why, why" like a certain sports media homer did in his radio broadcast. This isn't my job...I have a real one. Nevertheless, I'll post here when I make an observation. Common sense in sports is nearly dead. Now we're attempting to bring it back.
This entry was posted in Bandwagoning, Douchetastic, Entertainment, Football, Fraudulent, Haterade, Homerism, Money, Ratings Ho, Sports Media Douchery and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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