The Baby is too “light” to be mine

I’m watching Trisha Goddard’s trash I DVRed from last week. “Ro-Shon”, a “black” man claims he’s not the father of his ex-girlfriend’s child. He says the baby is too “light” to be his, meaning the child is fair skinned. Of course, the ex-girlfriend is “white.” And of course, the DNA test proves the child is his. He’s sorry.

And of course, he is sorry … as in pathetic. Why don’t these so-called “men” just say they don’t want to pay child support, they don’t want to support their children, they are totally influenced by the Trash Generation and they are near-total losers?

Here’s the BSP ladder of Manhood. Ladies, pay close attention.

The Man: You are the man who has it all … including the respect (and envy, almost) of every other man. You are secure. You have a good woman who is as successful and calls you as a couple, “we”. You drink Dos Equis. Other guys would hate you but they can’t because you’re so cool. You have the humility of the Average Dude, but you’re so clearly not. Think Derek Jeter, Peyton Manning.

Bag: You’re a dude who has it all, except humility and one other thing that makes you … well … a bag. Typically a self-image that makes you think you are The Man but you are so not the Man. People tell you how great you are, and you tell them how great you are. Think – High scoring NBA player

Average Dude: You are the average dude. You have some weaknesses, some big strengths and you generally live an above board life. You work hard, play hard. You and your woman will go out and have a beer on occasion. Think: Most men who live anonymous lives

Loser: You claim the child may not be yours. You are an absentee father, who doesn’t care if he sees his kids as long as he has opportunities to attempt to make more. Your woman occasionally has intercourse with other, better men who she wishes she was with. You claim illegal immigrants are taking jobs, but you wouldn’t even think of cleaning the toilets at Chili’s at 1 AM. Instead of looking for a job, you play Xbox or Playstation for 8-12 hours a day. Think: The guy who denies his kid on national television

Super-loser: You do horrendous things that get you placed in prison or shot by police officers. You may have appeared on Cops or America’s Most Wanted. You have an overinflated vision of yourself; you think you’re important but you’re not … or you desire to become infamous. 99 out of 100 people think you’re an ass; the other one is you. Think: Lee Harvey Oswald.


About bittersportspills

I love sports. I don't love the hype, homerism, ratings talk, self-important egomaniacs, bias or any of the other nonsense you get with the national media. Nor will you get the two clowns on sports talk radio who stage phony arguments. It doesn't make it entertaining. It makes it time to turn on your iPod and jam instead of listening to white noise generators. This is the sports blog for you, the ones who don't like everything Los Angeles or New York. Just because the sporting media is based there doesn't mean we have to like their teams. We do treat them fairly, though. That means if one of those cities has an average QB who plays particularly well...we'll note it. If they're garbage, we'll say so. Instead of crying "why, why, why" like a certain sports media homer did in his radio broadcast. This isn't my job...I have a real one. Nevertheless, I'll post here when I make an observation. Common sense in sports is nearly dead. Now we're attempting to bring it back.
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